If only I can call the fairies roaming in my head to appear before me and grant my wishes to lift my school works, I would have done it; but I cannot and it is actually life calling me from under.
Next week will be my preliminary term exams with incentives such as submission of projects, assignments, and book activities! It is super fun when I work it all in my head, but honestly exhausting doing it by hands. I have to ‘up’ my game today but something is pulling me back, causing my feet to tremble and pause for whatever I have to get done.
I love procrastination as it is what I breathe and I have got used to it since I usually do it. But I know I have to, somehow, pick it up and burn it—I have to change my ways and approaches to my school-related work. I purely hope it will be as light as preparing a cup of instant coffee or soaking a tea bag under a mug of hot water.
I should probably call my parents and tell them, “Mom and Dad, I need you to answer all my assignments,” but I think they will say, “No, son. You can do it. Good bye!”—they are very supportive, let me tell you. This rain of pressure is actually starting to get into my nerves—I become restless and sleep-deprived as I think working rather than sleeping. It is bad—horrible, even—but it is where I am today and I am preventing myself from acting upon it.
I shut down a few projects and a lot more to go before the deadline, but I know I can do it—I have to. The battle of pessimism and optimism is on fire today and I have to decide who wins. I so damn pray I will let the latter one hold the crown.
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